Friday, June 29, 2012

Dreaming of a Wedding

Photo by Peter J Bellis

Maybe it's the time of year or my time of life but I've been dreaming a lot of weddings. In my latest dream, I was in a small chapel with high ceilings. Everything was white. I was wearing a pale, pink dress. I realized, just before the ceremony was about to start, that I had forgotten to book any entertainment like musicians, but strangely I wasn't stressed out about it. I just thought matter of factly, "oh well, I can just do it myself."

Freud would say that dreaming of a wedding indicates wish fulfillment but others see weddings as symbols of relationships. That's why you can dream of marrying your mom or dad or some other totally inappropriate person. It's not something to be freaked out about, it just means you are thinking about your relationship with that person.

If you dream about a wedding, and you are about to get married in real life, pay attention to how you feel in your dream. Feelings of anxiety or panic could be unconscious feelings you have about the situation. The dream could be a warning to call off the wedding.

If the wedding doesn't seem related to real life relationships the wedding could be a symbol of unconscious romantic feelings you have towards the person you are marrying in the dream. A wedding could also be a symbol of a merger between two different ideas or aspects of yourself. Jung would say a wedding could symbolize the bringing together of masculine and feminine qualities in yourself (anima and animus).

If you are already married and dream of remarrying your spouse, the wedding could symbolize the need for a recommitment or change to your union. Dreaming that you are a best man or bridesmaid could mean you need to pay attention to feelings of jealousy or loneliness you are feeling towards the people getting married.

In traditional interpretations,dreaming of a wedding means a death in the family or a change in circumstances.

I see my wedding dream as being a symbol of a relationship with myself like Jung would suggest. My pink gown contrasting with the white chapel would suggest that maybe I am not as innocent and pure as I seem. Also, I realized that I could fill the role of the musical entertainment. This is an aspect of myself that I have been neglecting in real life.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Dreaming of an Ex

(photo by Roland Tangloa)

Every once in awhile I will have a dream about a particular ex-boyfriend. I always have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I'm happy to see him but on the other hand, its always frustrating. In these dreams we can never quite connect. For instance, we are having a great conversation and he's telling me something really important and then I wake up. Or else, in the dream, people are trying to thwart my attempts to be with him. I used to always wake up from these dreams really irritated. Why was I still dreaming about this guy?

I came to understand that my dream ex didn't really represent my real ex in these dreams. Rather an ex can be a symbol for lots of different things. He/she can symbolize a particular time period (i.e. high school) when this relationship took place. Dreaming of an ex can also represent a state of transition. You could also be still trying to work out the outcome of the relationship in your unconscious, the feelings and attachment. Your ex could symbolize your hopes for love that are maybe not being fulfilled in waking life.

Carl Jung would say if a woman dreams of a man he could symbolize her "animus" or the masculine traits of her personality she wants/needs to explore. (A man dreaming of a woman would be the opposite, his "anima".) Freud would say an ex could also represent wish-fulfillment, something that you long for because it's missing in daily life. Folk dream interpretation (as recorded by Gustavus Hindman Miller) places much value on the appearance of the man in question: "if handsome, well formed and supple, denotes that you will enjoy life vastly and come into rich possessions. If he is misshapen and sour-visaged, you will meet disappointments." If either of these words describe your ex then these outcomes probably did take place in real life!

So instead of feeling uncomfortable about these dreams, look at them as a chance to understand your feelings about life in general. And, one thing to remember, chances are he's dreaming about you too. Wonder what you represent?